This February brings two of my top five favorite holidays: Valentine’s Day and Mardi Gras. Since I’m still in Iowa, I won’t be celebrating Mardi Gras this year, which is a total bummer. Luckily, it’s easy to order King Cake online these days.
Life is continuing to be a brain dead, joyful whirlwind over here, but I am deadset on getting some things done this month. Mainly to wake my brain up.
Workout 3x a week. I finally got the clear to do light workouts starting today. Which is fantastic, considering that yesterday, my mom compared my upper arm strength to that of a puppy.
Read a book. I checked out four books the day before I ended up being induced, and all four are scattered throughout my mom’s house. T. is finally sleeping solo, so now’s the time to get a little reading time in.
Stop stressing out. I have a definite problem with always thinking about what I need to be doing three steps ahead, instead of just living in the moment. So this month, I’m not letting myself figure out wtf if next. No worrying about potential jobs or how we’re going to get set back up in NOLA. Just hanging out, breathing, reading and cuddling.
Drink more water. Just because I feel like I’m slacking.
Clearly, I’m keeping things extra simple this month. Which is extra strange for me, but probably exactly what I needed.
I’ve all but fallen off the face of the planet socially over the past two weeks. First I was feeling like the living version of death. And then, I went and had a baby.
That’s right, I’m officially a mom to a 8 day old boy. Early Saturday, I was feeling all sorts of pain that had me thinking contractions. My mom and I got to the emergency room and found out I had preeclampsia, which meant I had to be life flighted to a larger hospital that could handle an emergency c-section and had a PICU. Luckily, I was stable enough to deliver vaginally, and Theodore was healthy enough to avoid the PICU.
Theodore and I are now at my moms house. I’m on bed rest for the next 4 weeks at least, and crossing my fingers that my new blood pressure medicine works so that I don’t have a seizure. So seriously, cross your fingers for me.
The health issues do mean that my moving back to NOLA is on hold until I’m healthy. Kind of sucks, but it gives me more time to figure out what I want to do when I get back.
What have we been doing this week?
writing thank you notes. So necessary, and such a forgotten part of being polite.
washing, folding and taking inventory of all of Theodore’s clothes. Sadly, my health issues had an effect on Theodore and he came out at an itty-bitty 5.9 pounds. My stress and guilt about the whole thing is intense, but it means that none of his clothes will fit for awhile.
binge watching Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. My brother recommended the show and I’m honestly into it. Throw in the fact that everyone looks normal? Top notch.
saving crock pot recipes on Pinterest. The easier the better, and with enough for leftovers at lunch the next day, please.
I feel like my brain is dead, but my heart is so full it almost hurts.
y’all, this past week has been a doozy. I feel like I’m spending 18 hours a day minimum asleep, and trying to be semi productive and not despise myself for sleeping the other 6. The stress of everything is definitely just building and building, so much so that I had a panic attack Monday night. If you’ve never experienced a panic attack, either physically or by being present during a loved one’s count yourself lucky. They are ugly, they are scary, and it really is hard to believe that you’re not going to die.
(and ps, I super feel like a broken record talking about how stressed out I’ve been lately. But the only creature I have to talk to in real time is Scotti, so you’ll just have to deal with it.)
Every day, I’ve been trying to find something to do for at least half an hour, that distracts me from everything else. I used to think my version of self care was going to a bar and seeing what would happen with some guy, or getting drunk at home and seeing who from Tinder might stop by, but things have changed for the better the past year. Now I do things like watch silly reality TV (I just started the Bachelor for the first time ever, and whoa), look at vintage engagement rings on the internet, read a book, or do something that helps me feel pretty.
Last week, I took the time to make my favorite body scrub. By time, I mean about 5 minutes. I scrubbed that coffee in and scrubbed away the stupid. And my clay mask pulled out all sorts of negativity. That’s what Indian clay masks do, it’s a fact.
The question is, how many body scrubs and face masks does it take to take all the stress away? Do you have to do green juices and yoga in addition to it?
y’all, the new year is here and everything seems so new and clean. Which I know sounds completely ridiculous since not much has changed, but whatever. I decided this year to not make any major, life changing resolutions. I’m 100% comfortable at this point saying that I have ZERO clue what my life will be like in 2017 (besides way less stressful than 2016), and that’s kind of exciting. My purpose for the new year:
To be constantly working towards being my best self.
Every month, I’m going to be making a list of things to focus on for the following 30 days, with that in mind. My main goal to be working towards all year is to talk/message more like a grownup. That means dropping the lol, omg, and haha from being a consistent part of my vocabulary.
My January goals are pretty tame. Theodore is due February 3rd, so my main focus will be on resting and preparing.
Drink a green smoothie every morning. Kale and spinach are still not appetizing to me at all in their solid form at the moment, so green smoothies are the best way for me to get all those vitamins that the pros claim people need. Throw in the fact that I’ve definitely turned to bad carbs the past 2 weeks to deal with some feelings, and it’s good that the green smoothies are coming back into rotation. Simple Green Smoothies has a 7 day challenge that is super easy, and doesn’t require a pile of ingredients, so that’s how I’m kicking my mornings off.
Be physical for 45 minutes a day. Of course, I left all my maternity workout videos in my storage unit in NOLA, along with my underwear, so I’ve been all about Youtube. I usually do a mix of yoga, Glow Body PT, and BodyFit by Amy. Throw in the mile walk Scotti and I try to take every day, and I hit can hit that 45 minutes even if I’m feeling super lazy. I’ve also been doing the moves from this arm workout a few times a day. 45 seconds on, 15 seconds rest, and just one round at a time.
Pack my hospital bag. Easy enough. I need to make a Target trip to stock up on an extra toothbrush, hair ties and some granny panties.
Spend as much time with Scotti as possible. Self explanatory.
Get a pedicure. Because I can’t reach anymore. And, #treatyoself.
Here are some things I’ve did and learned this year:
that the right hashtags get your Instagram photos way more attention. I’m going to take you down in Instagram fame, Kylie Jenner.
I quit not one, but two jobs. Yes, I’m still unemployed, but to know I’m not at a job with zero growth, and that I’m not being disrespected on a daily basis, feels good. Yes, I know people aren’t supposed to quit jobs without a pile of savings and solid plan, but if you’re getting called a bitch every single day by your boss, then you have to go. The plus? After lots of time reading career blogs, watching TedTalks, and reading some career focused books, I have a much better idea of what I want to be doing with my time when I get back to having a job.
That people you would do anything for might not be able, or willing, to do the same for you. Some will crack under the pressure, and this could lead to things between you, them, and a whole lot of other people to be broken. I lost someone I adored this fall, and I’m not sure my heart will ever heal. But that’s okay. Yesterday, I was meditating, and came to the realization that just because this person broke my heart, doesn’t give me the right to break the hearts of other people. Will I be even slower with letting people in? (assuming I can get any slower) Yes. But the people who want in, will get in.
I have to force myself to be in more social settings. Being back in Iowa has made this especially obvious. Even being around people in a coffee shop gets my brain going in a better direction.
My tribe/squad/village/family has grown in ways I definitely would have never expected. Now I need to come up with a good way to show them that I adore them.
That whole getting knocked up on my birthday thing. So overwhelmed, so excited. Theodore will be here in about a month (and I have done zero to prepare)
Tonight, I will be bingewatching who knows what with Scotti, probably doing face masks and eating way too many Sour Patch Kids. Earlier, I made a list of all the things from 2016 that were less than stellar, and I plan on setting that list on fire around 11:59.
If 2016 was the greatest year of your life, congratulations! I hope that things continue being awesome for you. If 2016 seemed like the absolute worst and you’re completely shocked you survived, you only have a few more hours to power through and then you get to start sort of fresh.
*Please note, I’m writing this post at the request of my mother, who can’t figure out how to pass on links to baby registries.*
Everyone, as of today, we are 41 days away from when this kiddo is supposed to make his entry into the world. Not terrifying at all, right? I’m still not 100% sure if I’ll be delivering in New Orleans or Iowa, which I’m trying to see as part of the adventure, instead of a reason to stress out. PS, hour long workouts and forcing myself to meditate and journal for 30 minutes definitely helps with all the stress.
Now, my mom is stressing out about all the stuff that one needs for a baby. And the fact that I’m still (f)unemployed, but that makes the whole transition to maternity/bonding time that much easier. Meanwhile, I’m obsessing over fuzzy baby boots and miniature Air Jordans.
Anyways, back to the topic at hand. Making registries is so much fun. I made myself stick to Amazon and Target, and only doing them online. I just know that if I get that scanner gun in one hand, and a dirty chai from Starbucks, that Target wouldn’t know what hit it.
Here are the links that Linda can’t figure out how to pass on:
Amazon. I’ll admit, I do a lot of “add to registry” clicking here. I know I like options, and figure everyone else does too.
Target. Shorter and sweeter. The baby and I are going to be sharing a bedroom, so I’ve been wondering if I can add decoration stuff. And Scotti stuff. My furry boy is going to need some rawhides and such.
Plumfund. This is like GoFundMe, but without the sense of emergency that seems to go with it. Any $ gifts will go to bills, baby necessities, and the items I feel a little weird asking for, like nursing bras.
Do you see how beautiful this bag is? I fell in love before I even knew I was pregnant. Sturdy leather, roomy, and it converts into a backpack. It’s clearly nice enough that it’ll make my cutoffs and messy buns look a little nicer.
I’ll admit straight away that I’m not much of a snuggler. I find myself really excited to cuddle with Teddy though, and I’ve heard that wraps can be really good for helping mamas with postpartum depression. This print is so much fun and seems like it would disguise any stains that might be left behind.
A moses basket. Seriously, I might stalk this Instagram hashtag on a daily basis. It’s so cute and I just want Teddy to be a part of it. Since I’m really only planning to use it for photo opportunities, I ‘m hoping to find a cheaper one. Does anyone have any good ideas for how to use a moses basket after it’s been outgrown and between babies? I was thinking blanket or stuffed animal storage.
Y’all, in the three weeks we’ve been back in Iowa, Scotti has gotten super naughty. I feel so guilty. We went from being able to walk 3-4 miles a day, to maybe managing one and a half. The weather, plus my inability to breathe due to a growing baby means that the struggle is real.
Since we got to Eldora, Scotti has escaped the house not once, but three times. Luckily I’ve learned that if I just sit in his eyesight, holding a jar of peanut butter that he’ll come back to me pretty quickly. So now, while every house on the block is covered in Christmas decorations, my mom has a jar of peanut butter sitting on a window sill, ready to be grabbed. And small town greatness: peanut butter was on sale for 3 days at .99 cents, so we’re all stocked up for any future escapes.
And I sweat, the escapes started once I finally got frustrated enough to give him a not-so-great bang trim. It’s like he can finally see the freedom.
Now if only I could figure out a way to get Scotti to stop barking at the wind in the middle of the night.