recently reading 10.20.16

Really, so much of my time has been spent reading with Scotti by my side.


It’s finally cool enough that he doesn’t pout if I take him to the back yard, but he still prefers to sit on the couch so that he can watch the street.

I had seen reviews for Sweetbitter on various blogs and in magazines over the summer.  One magazine compared it to a Woody Allen style film, which should have been my first sign that I wouldn’t enjoy it.  But I like to know what other people think is good, so I checked it out anyways.  This book is decent, but I wouldn’t ever tell a stranger at the book store that they absolutely had to read it.  If you can read it for free, go for it, but don’t pay for this book.  Unless you’re really into books about girls whose worlds revolve around boys who sound kind of gross, and have sex with someone grosser once said boy breaks their heart as revenge.



chub love

My body has never been one that someone would describe as small.  Curvy, fat, chubby, statuesque, whatever.  I personally prefer chubby.  Some people are bothered by it, but whatever to them.

The takeover of models over a size 8 has been amazing.  These are the women that I desperately needed when I was growing up, and I’m so glad that younger girls get to exist in a world with these women.  Here’s an Instagram roundup of some of my current favorites.

All the girls are rocking swimsuits because 1) I love swimsuits and 2)that was the main reason I would cry when shopping growing up. I’ll admit that I just didn’t swim if I could avoid it for about 5 years growing up.

Miami. 🌴💃🏼👙

A photo posted by Hunter McGrady (@huntermcgrady) on

Beach day tomorrow? 🍍

A photo posted by Rachel Spencer (@kathleen.rach) on

Ready to pounce 🦁♌️

A photo posted by Leah Kelley (@leahkelley) on

BTS with @swimsuitsforall x @theashleygraham x @glamourmag

A photo posted by Katie Muirhead (@katie_muirhead) on

A photo posted by Robyn Lawley (@robynlawley) on

👙Wearing my 'Espionage' black string bikini👙 @swimsuitsforall

A video posted by A S H L E Y G R A H A M (@theashleygraham) on

life coaches and coffee shop creeping


I’ve been spending way too much time at coffee shops lately.  Iced Dirty Chai with Almond Milk and 3 Sugars in the Raw is my jam.  I’ve been trying to cut down on the baked goods, I’m currently only allowing myself two a week.  The struggle is real, but I feel like my ass is growing wobbly in ways that I’m just not okay with.

<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet” data-lang=”en”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>There’s a life coach here meeting with clients back to back and I feel like I could do this job</p>&mdash; Meredith Hope (@MidwestMere) <a href=”″>October 13, 2016</a></blockquote>

Every Thursday, the life coach comes into my preferred shop and spends her day meeting clients back to back.  1) I totally think I could handle being a life coach.  2) I’ve been totally stealing some of the discussion points/homework that the life coach has been giving and doing them myself.

There’s one client who I’m totally connecting with.  She’s overwhelmed by all her bills and has no idea what she wants to do for work, her life, anything.  So the life coach give her this assignment: think of the 4 things that define you (travel, food, volunteering, fitness, whatever).  Talk to the people that love you the most (your mom, your bestie, etc, up to 10 people) and have them also write down the 4 things that they think define you.  Find the 4things that are the most common, and come up with a plan to focus on them.

OMG I’m totally doing this tonight.  Why are we trying to be perfect in so many areas that we get stressed out and are only mediocre, and thus disappointed in ourselves, when we could find four things and thrive at them?

PS 2 of the client’s things were travel and volunteering, and she’s been wanting to go back to Southeast Asia to teach ESL, so she and the coach are coming up with a 12 month plan to get her there.



Recently Reading 10.13.16

Currently, my house is wi-fi free.  Slightly frustrating when it comes to the Verizon bill, but since I’m still (f)unemployed, it means I’m not spending all day binge watching Netflix and Hulu.  There’s a library branch 3 blocks from my house, so I’ve been going there to stock up on DVDs and books.  Books are my preferred way to escape reality at the moment and here are some recent favorites.



In all honesty, the idea of cults are both alluring and terrifying to me.  I can’t imagine being so into someone that I’d give them all my money, or consider murder, and yet I also find myself wanting a Kylie Lip Kit and to have Beyonce tell me that she loves me.

The Girls is an easy read and shouldn’t make you too nauseous when the main character starts talking about murder.  When I went to England in high school, I read Helter Skelter and was fully prepared to have some nightmares after reading this book, but am happy so say there were none.  If reading popular books is how you manage to be hip and cool, pick this up.  And then if you run into some kids who might not normally hit your radar, be kind to them.  Just in case.


You know those books that you just stumble upon and read, right when you need them? Well last month, that was How to Party with an Infant for me. I’m not going to lie, getting accidentally pregnant (for a second time) totally threw me off and I was am freaking out about the whole thing. Sure, the whole raising a human to not be an asshole thing is going to be a challenge, but how do you make friends, date, not sustain yourself on grapes, goldfish, apples and Diet Dr. Pepper? Actually, that’s pretty much a normalize toddler diet (minus the DDP) from what I’ve seen on Insta, so maybe I’ll be okay?
Anyways, regardless if you’re knocked up or not, read How to Party with an Infant. It’s humorous and a quick read.  As soon as I finished, I went and borrowed the Descendants DVD (same book author) from the library.  George Clooney can help a girl calm down and breathe pretty quickly.

In a couple weeks, my library branch will be closing until Thanksgiving so that they can move facilities.  If anyone has any Kindle or DVD recommendations, please send them my way.  And cross your fingers that I have a job by then so I can get internet at my place.


brain stream

I’ve spent the past two days trying to think of anything worth typing up.  Sure on Twitter there’s been some quick tales, but lately my mind (and world) have both been spinning in a way that makes it hard for things to seem composed.


A photo posted by Dallas Clayton (@dallasclayton) on

There is so much going on in the world, and for me it feels like you have to sift through 20 stories to find one that’s filled with good and happiness.  And then I start thinking about my own stress and feel so incredibly guilty.   Like in the grand scheme of things, my life is pretty easy.  I don’t have to worry about my family’s home being bombed while we’re sleeping.  I don’t see that a young man has been shot and immediately fear it’s one of my brothers. Aside from a cancer scare a couple years ago, I’m shockingly healthy, which seems to bother the occasional doctor when they see my chubby belly.  I know I’m pretty and if I wanted to put any effort into things, I could be super pretty.  I’m as social as I want to be (which really isn’t a lot), and clearly I have no problem getting laid.  My family is as supportive as I’ve ever expected them to be, and my dog more than likely believes that I am god.

But here I am, stressed.  Stressed because I am clearly not anywhere near to my childhood goals that I had plotted out for age almost 30 when I was about 8.  Stressed because holy fuck, I am 6 months pregnant and holy fuck, I just keep saying holy fuck and that’s probably not good because the baby app says he can hear me.  Stressed because yeah, being a mom was honestly one of my ultimate goals, but it’s not something I imagined doing alone.  Stressed because right now I have no idea what I want to do with my life, where I want or need to be, don’t have a job and am super duper broke (for real baby Jesus, venmo/paypal me 10grand so I can breathe money wise).  I’m stressed because my hair is fading to this weird color and I’m not really sure what I should do with it.

But this will all be okay.  Maybe not for Syria, but for me.  But hey, once I get the me stuff figured out, I can focus more on international policy and all the fun that comes with that.



art and dreams

When Scotti and I go out for walks, I swear he can find a group of boys to love from 3 blocks away.  When Bayou St John isn’t too busy, and the temperatures aren’t too high, I give him a little freedom and let him lead.  Last Sunday, he took us down a quiet street that we rarely go down, and what did we stumble upon?  A makeshift art sale.  Some elementary school aged brothers had decided they needed a new Lego set, and their mom said they had to earn the money themselves.  So they busted out their canvases and paint and went to work.

Can I just say that I’m 1)super impressed when parents let their kids find ways to earn what they want and 2) love that the boys decided against the everyday lemonade stand.

These are the beauties that I went home with.  And PS best $5.00 I’ve ever spent.  One of my goals for this year on my lease is to make my apartment more of a home, and that includes adding some art.  These were the perfect ways to get that ball rolling.  And another plus? My brother is a touch embarrassed by the paintings an rolls his eyes every time he sees them.

Here are some other artists that I’m fangirling over, and totally plan on buying one day when I have a few extra thousand dollars running around.  I’m linking to their Instas (Insta’s?), in part because that’s how I discovered them all and I kind of pretend we’ll socialize in the future.

  • Ashley Longshore.  This woman loves her pop culture and celebrates being female.  With regular droppings of the F-word and talking about pussy power, her Instagram and art will definitely inspire some boldness.  And her use of gold leaf and Lil Wayne? Sigh.
  • Oleysa. Bright colors, dreamy getaways and lip prints.  I find lips to be super sexy and could totally see a his/hers combo over a future marital bed.
  • Donald Robertson. His girls are gorgeous (if someone were to send me one of his Bloomingdale Bikini Girls prints, I’d be stoked), his collaborations make we want to buy clothes/purses/makeup from places other than Target, and his videos of his twin boys make me a little less scared of the idea of raising a boy next year.
  • Teil. These summer vacation inspired paintings are the best reason I’ve ever seen to buy a beach house.
  • Dorothy Shain. More future beach house decor.  Clearly I have a love of bright colors, bikinis and sundresses.



hair decisions


I’m one of those people that sees a change in hair as the perfect reason to change your life.  I’ll admit to going shorter and blonder when done with a boy, and after I quit my job in August, I went bright purple.


My hair has faded to this platinum blonde/blue/silver mess and I’ve been trying to decide what exactly I want to do next with it.  Do I keep it fun and silly since it’s already bleached out?  Do I find a more grown-up hue so that I can look professional and won’t have to stress about roots come February?

So many thoughts, and since I really have nothing to do besides sit at the library on the internet or hang out with Scotti, my hair is getting all my energy.

Here are some of the options I’ve been bouncing through my head:

#Greenhair envy with @taylorrae_hair in the Beyond the Star #bunpin

A photo posted by Kitsch (@mykitsch) on

This green/blue combo has me swooning.

This one has some amazing winter princess vibes and would be an excellent reason for me to buy some non-gray sweaters.

#grey #greyombrehair #haircolors #ideas #hairideas @loveisinthehair_byjanet

A photo posted by Rita's Beauty Bar (@ritasbeautybar) on

More winter vibes, but with an evil queen twist.  Not sure I’m cool enough to pull this off, but I’m always willing to try.

Please note that I don’t even have a hair appointment set yet, but it’s always goof to plan ahead.  Right? Right.